[ As dense as Siegfried is, even he cannot miss the weight of the silence that falls between them. He isn't arrogant enough to simply assume that Percival would ask him to sleep with him, but he knows Percival, and he knows that he would only consider doing such a thing with someone he trusts.
The problem? He's the only one that fits that criteria, and if there was one thing he craved to keep for a semblance of normalcy, it was his friendship with Percival. He didn't relish the thought of marring over a decade of camaraderie with sex, and especially not when he knows Percival well enough to know that ordinarily he'd only be intimate with someone he loves.
He stays quiet for a long moment after their eyes have made contact, lips pursed as he keeps ahold of his cup. It isn't that he's never thought about it before— Percival has always been beautiful, and his noble spirit has always made Siegfried proud to be in his presence. But to act on such an urge was not only unbecoming of himself, it was also inappropriate for their status and roles at the time. ]
I don't think that's a good idea. [ He says quietly, looking as calm as always even if his body has tensed considerably. He takes another sip of his coffee, but now finds that it tastes both empty and cold. ]
It may be best to wait a bit longer. The magic here fades, sometimes.
[ That's not always true. Usually, when something required a sexual act, nothing less would do. But this is Siegfried's version of desperately finding something to say. ]
[ The silence that befalls the room is painful, every second more agonizing than the last, and the time between when Siegfried seems to register Percival's request and when he actually speaks seems to crawl by so slowly. Percy's definitely feeling a little queasy now, the anxiety bundled up in the pit of his stomach like a tight ball.
Of course the answer would be no. He doesn't know what had come over him to make him even consider this a possibility. They are old friends, but the roles they took on back then seemed to set a precedent for their relationship so far. Siegfreid may not be his captain anymore, but a lot of the time, it still feels like he is. There's no universe where the other man would ever look at him this way, and it brings Percival immense shame and guilt that he had tried to sullen their noble relationship. ]
Of course. I am such a fool. [ Why did he even ask? This is not be something he should be wanting, almost forbidden. Percival turns away now, bringing that cup to his lips just so it feels like he has something to cover his face with. ]
You're right. I should not have tried to disrespect the relationship we have. Please forget I said anything.
[ He'll wait for the magic to fade then, as Siegfried had said, because he's often right. Or maybe learn to live this way. He's feeling so ashamed that he's not in any state to be planning his next moves right now. ]
[ Siegfried isn't sure what's heavier— Percival's words or the silence that falls between them right after. Though Siegfried usually finds no particular discomfort in silence, today, he wishes he didn't have to suffer it.
The way Percival answers him, in his very Percival way, as if Siegfried's quiet refusal doesn't mean anything more than politely turning down a second cup of coffee, makes his heart feel heavy. He knows Percival well enough to know that if he had felt courageous enough to ask him, he'd given it a lot of thought already. Percival didn't do anything on impulse.
And why can't Siegfried accept, exactly? As the seconds pass, he's finding it more and more difficult to keep this resolve. He doesn't accept because of a notion of noble comradery and friendship— one that is irrelevant here, in a land driven entirely by sexual intimacy. There'a a small part of him that still can't help but see it as inappropriate, but even that seems like such a foolish notion. They haven't been captain and vice-captain in over a decade. Neither of them have official ties to the knights of Feendrache anymore.
He sighs, a tinge of anger in his voice at the other's self-flagellation. ]
Cease this. You are not a fool. [ Not anymore than himself, anyway. He certainly feels like a fool for how easily Percival makes him regret his words, and how he feels the inexplicable urge to reassure him that doesn't actually want to reject him.
He has grown too soft.
Another few moments pass, and Siegfried sets his cup down with a firm clink. He shifts so that they're sitting closer, close enough that their legs touch, and he reaches out to take the other's wrist in his hand. ]
Why must you put me in such a difficult position by asking this? My resolve is not as strong as you might think, Percival.
[ He presses the other's knuckles to his lips, not yet moving, eyes closing in thought. ]
[ As he's turned away he had half expected Siegfried to want to avoid him, given this awkwardness he had forced upon them both. He wouldn't even be very surprised if the man were to suddenly decide to disappear again with no explanation or notice, even if he would regard that with some stinging resignation. The leg nudged up against his is certainly a surprise, and the hold over his wrist even more so. Gradually, it's like his mind cannot catch up to what's going on, his last neurons compelling him to place down the coffee mug in that distracted way so he doesn't spill it everywhere. ]
Siegfried ... [ What is meant by that? There's no one with a stronger resolve, with Siegfried existing as the definition of 'strength' itself. So if he doesn't mean the resolve to hold out in battle, there's only one thing he could mean (and it makes sense given the context), but Percival's brain is taking longer than it should trying to catch up.
He all about short circuits when he feels that brush of soft lips against his knuckle, eyes gone wide, heart racing fast as the colour in his face starts to rival his hair. It's a good thing that coffee cup was set down, because he certainly would have spilled it then. It's a kiss, and one so gentle and soft it's got his heart blooming butterflies. No words can describe what he's seeing, the picture of Siegfried with his hair framing his face, lips pressed to a hand in a perfect gesture of courtship. Handsome in every sense of the word. He does wonder how many others have been treated to this scene given the nature of Erku, but a seed of jealousy festers inside him at the thought and he decides it best not to dwell. ]
I don't want to misunderstand this ... What do you want to do?
[ What does he want to do? That's a great question. He can't exactly answer it outright, because what he wants to do isn't something he wants to verbalize. Not when it comes to Percival. Even if the other man is the one that brought up the idea, Siegfried can't help but feel as though this land has corrupted him beyond salvaging.
He's truly sitting here, basking in the feel of Percival's hand in his lips, thinking about indulging the idea of sleeping with him? It sounds like madness if he thinks too much about it.
But if he stops thinking so much, it makes perfect sense. They trust each other. They've been through hell and back together. Why not Percival?
He knows the answer even if he'd never admit. Because Percival wasn't just a casual encounter he could be friendly towards but keep at a reasonable distance. Percival actually had the potential to dig deeper at Siegfried's psyche, and the thought unsettles him. He had always accepted that Percival was a beautiful person inside, but to have to come to terms with his outer beauty, too?
He really can't dwell on the thought too much. The reality is, his friend has come to him, and he wouldn't leave him in the cold. ]
You said you wanted to get rid of those ears and that tail, didn't you? I'm telling you we'd best get going.
[ he pulls on the other's hand now, eyes locked firmly on the other man to see what he'd do. This is a terrible idea. But they'd commit to that terrible idea together, at least. ]
[ That confirmation was all he needed to make sure he wasn't reading the entire situation wrongly in some devastating way (then again, there wasn't quite any other way to read it). When Siegfried gives Percival that tug on his hand, the reality of what they're about to do sets in now. His heart starts to race with both excitement and apprehension, the uncertainties he has about how this would affect the nature of their friendship still present but deliberately put aside.
He's admired Siegfried and his brave, noble heart since his teens. That aspect is known to everyone. Percy's attraction to his ex-commander's handsome beauty and natural charisma was something difficult for him to confront, however, and now he has no choice but to acknowledge the fact that he's drawn to his old friend in many more ways than one. ]
Of course. [ Into the bedroom of their modest home. It's not the ideal place, but even Percy's too distracted by the sensation of Siegfried's fingers entwined in his to have many complaints. After they enter that room, he slides his fingers out of Siegfried's gingerly, face burning red and eyes averted as he toys with the fabric of his own robes with bashfulness. ]
Let's undress then. [ That annoying tail flicks a few times in nervousness, before he unties the sash and shrugs his robe off his shoulders. The pants and underwear go soon after, but he keeps a hold over his robe to cover his exposed groin. this tag is extra ukey hm..... why this ]
[ If Siegfried had ever entertained the thought of this happening (and as previously stated, he had, he wasn't a saint), it certainly wasn't under these circumstances. It was never because Percival was plagued with extra appendages he didn't want, and never in a room like this.
It doesn't matter. What does matter is that Percival looks even better than he'd imagined in any of these idle and guiltridden daydreams of the past. He's momentarily gone quiet as the other man strips, eyes taking in the exposed skin that Percival isn't able to cover.
He would have liked to disrobe the other man himself, but he'd moved too quickly and of his own accord, and he supposes this is more efficient, anyway.
Because this was all practical, wasn't it? Not something to make a habit of.
Unceremoniously, he begins unclothing himself as well, pulling his simple t-shirt over his head and stepping out of his trousers. It's about as sexy as one would expect someone getting ready for work, rather than what was really going to happen. He leaves his undergarments on.
There's some embarrassment on his end, too, his cheeks tinged with color, and maybe that would help Percival cope better with his own apprehension. He steps closer to him, fingers trailing over the top of his robe being held in place. ]
Are you having second thoughts?
[ He looks Percival directly in the eye. He's always been able to trust Percival to say what's on his mind, and now is no exception. The last barrier needs to come off, but not if Percival still has doubt. ]
[ Perhaps he might have been too hasty, but with the way Percival was it shouldn't come as any surprise. He's always coped with uncertainties by pushing forward, whether it be training his body, honing up his skills or searching relentlessly for the answer that he seeks.
His heart beats quicker in his chest when Siegfried draws near, and the warmth he can feel radiating off the other man is well-noted. Percival's face may be averted, but his gaze flickers to Siegfried one too many times, taking in the sight of the other man's body - something his imagination has traveled in those few guilt-ridden occasions he's pondered over what the other man might look like beneath his many layers. A proud, sculpted form, with skin sunkissed and ridden with the scars of his many pursuits. It's better than he had envisioned.
When his eyes travel to Siegfried's face, he takes notice of that blush settling by his cheeks, and that's definitely a new development. It spurs Percival on now, that feeling that he wasn't alone in his shyness. ]
Not at all. [ He's found some confidence now, and the hand shielding his modesty lowers, Percival himself taking a step closer into Siegfried's space. ] I've never seen your face take that shade.
[ It's quite cute. He feels like he has permission, so he reaches out to touch, brushing Siegfried's hair to the side. ] Surely you must be used to this by now, given the way this place is ...
[ Some of the tension in his body unwinds when Percival reaffirms his intention to not back down. He still harbors a few reservations of going through with this himself, but those qualms are dissolving rapidly by the second and are completely vanished with the last reveal of Percival's cock. It marks the point of no return, and makes his own stir with interest beneath his boxer briefs.
Percival acknowledging his blush only deepens the color, the tender gesture making his heart ache.
They are so different, but he has so much reverence for Percival. Likely more than Percival himself knows. ]
It's embarrassing when you point it out like that...
[ The next sentence makes his eyes flutter closed and his lips purse. Next follows a small smile. ]
What do you take me for, Percival? [ a SLUT?? anyway Percival isn't wrong, this simply isn't a topic he wants to dwell on. He'd rather focus on Percival, not think about previous encounters. Not when the current one holds so much weight and makes him emotionally unsettled.
He chooses to end the topic there, if Percival will allow him, by stepping forward and initiating a kiss, their first kiss, a gesture that sends wildfire through his veins even if it's soft and tentative. His hands frame the other's face. ]
I ... [ That's not what he meant at all. He was just trying to understand the reason for Siegfried's light fluster, because it didn't seem to be the direct result of inexperience. Percy's never seen this side of Siegfried, and he doesn't have any complaints.
He doesn't have a chance to clarify himself, and when Siegfried draws closer he doesn't feel like he particularly wants to. The topic is left to disappear in the wind, overshadowed by the very real experience of sharing a first kiss with an old, cherished friend he's revered since his teens.
His heart races in his chest, those butterflies making their home in his stomach, and it takes a second for his mind to catch up before he allows his deeper inhibitions to take the reigns just this once. Percival tilts his head into the kiss, hands trembling but wanting as they reach out to splay over Siegfried's chest, shifting up his shoulders and wrapping around his neck. ]
[ This isn't the first time he's been physically close to Percival. They've huddled close together during makeshift camps, practicality winning out over personal comfort during chilly nights while the army was on the move. But this sort of heat between them feels so very starkly different, exciting in the implicit promise of their bare skin touching and comforting because he's shared this closeness before.
Kissing Percival, however— that's an entirely new experience. His lips are softer than he could have imagined, the kiss tender and curious and completely at odds with Percival's usual temperament. But he knows Percival, underneath it all, is sweet. It's what's made Siegfried so drawn to him over the years, his generosity and genuine love for his fellow man traits that Siegfried admired and drew inspiration from. He feels privileged to access this soft side of him, even if at the moment it's physically.
He wraps his arms around the other's waist, letting his fingertips trickle down his spine.
Oh, right. He'd momentarily forgotten about that tail.
Curious, his fingers curl around the base of it, giving it a few experimental tugs and stroking along the fur. He pulls away from their kiss briefly because at this point it's apparently better to ask for forgiveness rather than permission, letting their noses touch. ]
... Sorry. [ this is a very serious undertaking and he doesn't take it lightly, but he just can't help it. It's so cute. ]
[ It's so rare that he's actually held, his strict and stuffy demeanor often putting some distance between himself and others (when he doesn't deliberately push them away himself). His body's unused to the touch, especially right now while vulnerable and exposed, and the fingers encircling his slim waist have all his muscles tensing. It's not bad. Nice, actually, like he's being claimed.
Though, that bubble of pleasant thought pops with the bizarre sensation of having his tail stroked and tugged, the receptors in that appendage that hadn't existed there a week before firing up and feeling so strange. Much like a cat, that tail tenses up, hairs standing. ]
I don't think you are very sorry. [ Percy frowns, face flushed and frazzled and showing discontentment, but thankfully what Siegfried had done isn't enough to make him want to pull away. ] That feeling ... I cannot get used to it still.
[ Siegfried doesn't stop holding him close. Unfortunately he quite likes the look of Percival's face not only flushed, but frazzled.
It really is like a feline's tail. He must truly be becoming a deviant, because the way it tenses and flickers within his hand only makes his desire heighten. ]
Does it feel unpleasant?
[ He loosens his hold on it, running his fingers down the fur more gently, a silent apology. He dots light kisses on Percival's cheek. ]
[ With the touch more gentle, the muscles of that tail loosen up, curling in a more languid, snake-like movement. The combination of being kissed and having his fur stroked puts Percival in an odd kind of mood, like he's bubbling in flutter and bliss but trying his best to remain petulant. The more Siegfried handles that tail, the more it curls around his wrist. ]
I suppose ... not. [ It would be untoward to lie. His ears have flattened down on his head at this point, fingers digging lightly into Siegfried's back as the touch compels him to crane his neck much like a cat. ] Is this fun for you?
[ Siegfried murmurs against neck. Perhaps he should leave this alone, given how unhappy Percival had been about having these extra appendages in the first place. But he's drawn to how such simple touches can make the other man squirm like this, enticed by the tail curling around his wrist. He scratches lightly at the base. ]
Should I stop?
[ But unless Percival speaks up very soon, he's going to direct his other hand to thread into his hair, tracing the curvature of those flattened feline ears. ]
[ It feels too nice to make Siegfried stop, those cursed animal-like appendages somehow so sensitive even though they lacked any functional, biological purpose to be so. It's unbecoming to be coming off so wanton, but he might actually miss the touch if Siegfried were to stop. Though he doesn't have the mechanisms to purr like a cat would, Percival does something similar, little pleased sounds escaping from his throat as Siegfried touches his ears. ]
Don't stop ... [ It's so shameful that he likes this, but he does. Well, there's no reason to keep being ashamed when they're already in the nude and know exactly what they're about to do. ]
I see the purpose of these useless appendages now. [ To encourage sex, probably. It's working. He's definitely hard now, and compelled to lean into the touch, so he does, wrapping his arms around Siegfried and nestling against his body. The desire for warmth and affection is compelling. He's melting into Siegfried's hold, ears flattened down in contentment and tail swaying about. ]
[ Siegfried has never been particularly attracted to Erunes: in fact, he's never even been with one. But there's something about animal features on Percival specifically that makes the other man... well, precious to be frank. Percival has always had the temperament of a cat, anyway, so to see him take on the habits of one is cute.
But the fact that he's naked and pressed against him? There's nothing cute about what he wants to do to him. His breath hitches in his throat as he pulls them closer, and he can feel the edge of Percival's cock press against his thigh.
It's time to stop playing around.
He rests his hands where he'd originally intended to let them wander, gripping Percival's ass and lifting him with a hold on his upper thighs. Like this, trusting that Percival will know to hold onto his neck and shoulders, he carries him to the bed, laying him down on his back. He pulls off his underwear before joining him. ]
[ There's a yelp as he feels those calloused hands over his rear, and his feet leaving the ground in a swift, effortless motion soon after. Percival scrambles for purchase, latching onto Siegfried's neck and shoulders to avoid slipping right off. ]
Wait a second! [ It's emasculating to be picked up so easily, even if he's long known about Siegfried's impressive strength. Percival's weight should be of effort to him, the one slighter in build between them both. Soon, he's laid down, underwear flying off to somewhere on the bed, and there's one hell of a man climbing over him.
It's definitely real now. It's happening. His heart's beating so quick, but he quite relishes in the feeling of Siegfried's larger frame hovering over him, entertaining the racy thought that it would be nice to be pinned down. He shelves that quickly because there's a shame that overcomes him soon after.
Tentatively, hands reach out, moving down the span of Siegfried's chest and tugging at his waistband. ] Yours also. Let me see it ...
[ The tail continues to sway with anticipation, brushing up against Siegfried's thigh and curling around it. ]
[ Even though they've made it this far, have touched each other a fair amount, kissed... it's hard to believe that this isn't a dream. This really is Percival beneath him, bare and exposed, somehow simultaneously erotic and endearing.
He smiles at Percival's eagerness to pull down his underwear, a new rush of excitement coursing through his veins. This isn't a side of Percival he's ever seen, but, shamefully, he finds himself liking it. The tail curling around his thigh only teases him further. ]
I'll let you do the honors, then.
[ His hands go over Percival's, guiding him to pull down on the garment. Once that's off, he reclaims his spot on top of him, waves of chestnut-colored hair forming a curtain around their cheeks as he indulges in what he'd fantasized about just a few minutes prior: taking one of those feline ears between his teeth and nibbling lightly. ]
[ He's definitely feeling that blissful bubble when Siegfried draws near, leaning up to meet him almost instinctively. The lips and teeth capturing the tips of his new ears has him letting out a shiver, tensing as he closes his eyes and gets used to the sensation.
Of course, he's never been one to idle. Percival reaches out himself, hands exploring the canvas of rugged flesh and different scars on display before him, fingertips trailing the embossed ridges of the ones along Siegfried's chest that he's able to touch. There are some that pull out a memory of battles long past, those chaotic days crossing swords against the enemy, where he would always look upon this man for guidance and inspiration. There are also some he doesn't recognise, which brings upon a sinking feeling when he's reminded of their lost time -- when he simply believed what he was told about Siegfried and hadn't questioned it as much as he should have.
When his fingers trail around, roaming over the span of Siegfried's muscled back, he's met with a rougher sensation much unlike the rest. It's not normal skin, having an almost snake-like quality. ]
Oh. This ... [ That sinking feeling continues when he realises what he's touching. It's easy to forget what's actually going on with the other man, especially with how rarely he bares his body. ] Has it gotten worse?
[ He doesn't spend all of his time and attention at those ears— they are a novelty, yes, but so is the rest of Percival's body, and he desires the real and permanent parts of him so much more. He trails his lips down the other's temple, taking a small detour to kiss those lips one last time before burying his nose within the crook of his neck, craving that warmth.
He can feel Percival's hands exploring him, taking their time to map out his body, and being treated with such gentleness and reverence makes Siegfried's chest ache with a different sort of longing. How many times have they already given their bodies to each other, in the form of taking literal deadly blows for the other's sake? He gently parts the other's legs with his palms, settling in between them and groaning at the sensation of his fingers roaming his back.
The patches of skin there, the parts of him that are onyx and cold rather than human... when they meet the warmth of Percival's fingers it becomes immediately obvious those areas are especially responsive to touch. His muscles tense and relax every time his fingers graze over them.
He looks back up, giving the other man what he hopes is a reassuring smile. He also wonders if Percival is turned off by their presence. ]
Hm. Yes, but the spread seems to have slowed down. [ He returns his attention to Percival's adam's apple, nuzzling his nose against it. ] You don't have to touch there if you don't wish to.
[ Percival's legs are parted with no resistance, the rest of him malleable and eager. The sensation of flesh directly pressed to his groin, coupled with Siegfried's careful and tender attention to his lips and neck, provide such a distraction he's finding it difficult to concentrate on speaking, little whimpers escaping his throat when he tries.
The soft smile that Siegfried gives probably was intended to be reassuring, but it's not enough to cull the worries that make home in Percival's mind when he's confronted with the fact that his old friend is turning into a dragon. Will he lose his mind along with his form? 'Slowed down' doesn't quite mean it's stopped.
Siegfried's quick to give him that out, as if the scales are anything to be disgusted at. Percival retaliates by touching them directly, fingers following along the ridges of each scale. ]
Why wouldn't I want to? You're still the same man, no matter what becomes of you. Do you think our relationship is so shallow I would be deterred by outside appearances?
[ His words are firm, but his touch is soft, exploring the new skin with one hand and threading his flingers through Siegfried's hair with the other. ]
[ Percival likely doesn't know just how much those words affect him, how much they make his chest feel warm with affection. Percival is one of the few people who has always accepted him wholly, no matter how many others questioned his methods or called him a monster.
Even when he'd thought him a murderer, Percival's forgiveness had come swiftly and laced with the typical layer of hidden empathy he always had.
His loyalty was unprecedented. The thought makes Siegfried lean down to kiss his jaw.
He isn't ready for this conversation. Not when his night is looking so lovely and positive and filled with resolving years of hidden desire. ]
Is that so? Will you still bed me when my transformation is complete, then? I think we might need a much bigger bed... I doubt I would even fit in this apartment.
[ He's joking, to deflect, because he can't even fathom the actual reality of that happening. He'd sooner disappear into the wilderness to keep others safe than entertain such an idea.
He shakes his head, sighing as he feels those fingers roam again. ]
Thank you, Percival. It'll be alright.
[ It has to be. He continues his journey southward, because there's nothing more he wants to do than to forget his impending doom within the soft caress of Percival's hips, to lose himself in creamy thighs. ]
[ Though said in jest, Percival's tendency to take a lot of things seriously means he takes that joke seriously at first. His eyes grow wide and he stares stunned for those few seconds. ] What?
[ To any logical and rational person, bedding a dragon sounds like an aberrant and dangerous thing. It goes without saying that he would not even consider that sort of act with any other wild beast or creature. This is Siegfried, however, and now he's struck with aberrant thoughts of how such an act would play out. It's a daunting thing - the logistics would make it near impossible - but there's a part of him that thinks he'll probably still want to please the other man, no matter what form he takes. He'll also still want to experience that raw power and gentle intimacy behind each and every of Siegfried's touches - having had a taste of it now, it would be difficult to go back.
Aberrant thoughts all around. Percival's face starts to burn red, and he closes his eyes, turning away in shame. ] Enough jest. Neither of us want that to happen to you.
[ They'll find a way to stop the spread before it's too late. That's what he should be focused on, not ... whatever it was that had plagued his mind before.
He can feel the brush of Siegfried's curls against his chest as the man descends, and Percy finally looks upon him, face still pink and lips pursed. He shifts his body into a more inviting position, thighs parting and sandwiching Siegfried's torso. His hands continue to encourage that touch, rubbing slowly down the span of his back. ]
[ It was easy for Siegfried to push the thought of his curse away. That is, after all, something he's extremely accustomed to doing. The root of his fears lie not with "what would happen to me", but "I don't want to hurt others".
But what matters is that they're here now, human and performing what is the most human act since the beginning of time. He looks up at Percival as he settles between his legs, making brief eye contact and giving him a small reassuring smile. Even if the other still looks abashed, the reassuring touch at his back encourages him.
Siegfried buries himself in Percival's inner thigh, kissing along the soft skin, making a path inward. Until his lips can reach their destination, he curls his fingers around Percival's shaft, stroking the hardened flesh slowly, teasingly. ]
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no subject
The problem? He's the only one that fits that criteria, and if there was one thing he craved to keep for a semblance of normalcy, it was his friendship with Percival. He didn't relish the thought of marring over a decade of camaraderie with sex, and especially not when he knows Percival well enough to know that ordinarily he'd only be intimate with someone he loves.
He stays quiet for a long moment after their eyes have made contact, lips pursed as he keeps ahold of his cup. It isn't that he's never thought about it before— Percival has always been beautiful, and his noble spirit has always made Siegfried proud to be in his presence. But to act on such an urge was not only unbecoming of himself, it was also inappropriate for their status and roles at the time. ]
I don't think that's a good idea. [ He says quietly, looking as calm as always even if his body has tensed considerably. He takes another sip of his coffee, but now finds that it tastes both empty and cold. ]
It may be best to wait a bit longer. The magic here fades, sometimes.
[ That's not always true. Usually, when something required a sexual act, nothing less would do. But this is Siegfried's version of desperately finding something to say. ]
no subject
Of course the answer would be no. He doesn't know what had come over him to make him even consider this a possibility. They are old friends, but the roles they took on back then seemed to set a precedent for their relationship so far. Siegfreid may not be his captain anymore, but a lot of the time, it still feels like he is. There's no universe where the other man would ever look at him this way, and it brings Percival immense shame and guilt that he had tried to sullen their noble relationship. ]
Of course. I am such a fool. [ Why did he even ask? This is not be something he should be wanting, almost forbidden. Percival turns away now, bringing that cup to his lips just so it feels like he has something to cover his face with. ]
You're right. I should not have tried to disrespect the relationship we have. Please forget I said anything.
[ He'll wait for the magic to fade then, as Siegfried had said, because he's often right. Or maybe learn to live this way. He's feeling so ashamed that he's not in any state to be planning his next moves right now. ]
no subject
The way Percival answers him, in his very Percival way, as if Siegfried's quiet refusal doesn't mean anything more than politely turning down a second cup of coffee, makes his heart feel heavy. He knows Percival well enough to know that if he had felt courageous enough to ask him, he'd given it a lot of thought already. Percival didn't do anything on impulse.
And why can't Siegfried accept, exactly? As the seconds pass, he's finding it more and more difficult to keep this resolve. He doesn't accept because of a notion of noble comradery and friendship— one that is irrelevant here, in a land driven entirely by sexual intimacy. There'a a small part of him that still can't help but see it as inappropriate, but even that seems like such a foolish notion. They haven't been captain and vice-captain in over a decade. Neither of them have official ties to the knights of Feendrache anymore.
He sighs, a tinge of anger in his voice at the other's self-flagellation. ]
Cease this. You are not a fool. [ Not anymore than himself, anyway. He certainly feels like a fool for how easily Percival makes him regret his words, and how he feels the inexplicable urge to reassure him that doesn't actually want to reject him.
He has grown too soft.
Another few moments pass, and Siegfried sets his cup down with a firm clink. He shifts so that they're sitting closer, close enough that their legs touch, and he reaches out to take the other's wrist in his hand. ]
Why must you put me in such a difficult position by asking this? My resolve is not as strong as you might think, Percival.
[ He presses the other's knuckles to his lips, not yet moving, eyes closing in thought. ]
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Siegfried ... [ What is meant by that? There's no one with a stronger resolve, with Siegfried existing as the definition of 'strength' itself. So if he doesn't mean the resolve to hold out in battle, there's only one thing he could mean (and it makes sense given the context), but Percival's brain is taking longer than it should trying to catch up.
He all about short circuits when he feels that brush of soft lips against his knuckle, eyes gone wide, heart racing fast as the colour in his face starts to rival his hair. It's a good thing that coffee cup was set down, because he certainly would have spilled it then. It's a kiss, and one so gentle and soft it's got his heart blooming butterflies. No words can describe what he's seeing, the picture of Siegfried with his hair framing his face, lips pressed to a hand in a perfect gesture of courtship. Handsome in every sense of the word. He does wonder how many others have been treated to this scene given the nature of Erku, but a seed of jealousy festers inside him at the thought and he decides it best not to dwell. ]
I don't want to misunderstand this ... What do you want to do?
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He's truly sitting here, basking in the feel of Percival's hand in his lips, thinking about indulging the idea of sleeping with him? It sounds like madness if he thinks too much about it.
But if he stops thinking so much, it makes perfect sense. They trust each other. They've been through hell and back together. Why not Percival?
He knows the answer even if he'd never admit. Because Percival wasn't just a casual encounter he could be friendly towards but keep at a reasonable distance. Percival actually had the potential to dig deeper at Siegfried's psyche, and the thought unsettles him. He had always accepted that Percival was a beautiful person inside, but to have to come to terms with his outer beauty, too?
He really can't dwell on the thought too much. The reality is, his friend has come to him, and he wouldn't leave him in the cold. ]
You said you wanted to get rid of those ears and that tail, didn't you? I'm telling you we'd best get going.
[ he pulls on the other's hand now, eyes locked firmly on the other man to see what he'd do. This is a terrible idea. But they'd commit to that terrible idea together, at least. ]
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He's admired Siegfried and his brave, noble heart since his teens. That aspect is known to everyone. Percy's attraction to his ex-commander's handsome beauty and natural charisma was something difficult for him to confront, however, and now he has no choice but to acknowledge the fact that he's drawn to his old friend in many more ways than one. ]
Of course. [ Into the bedroom of their modest home. It's not the ideal place, but even Percy's too distracted by the sensation of Siegfried's fingers entwined in his to have many complaints. After they enter that room, he slides his fingers out of Siegfried's gingerly, face burning red and eyes averted as he toys with the fabric of his own robes with bashfulness. ]
Let's undress then. [ That annoying tail flicks a few times in nervousness, before he unties the sash and shrugs his robe off his shoulders. The pants and underwear go soon after, but he keeps a hold over his robe to cover his exposed groin. this tag is extra ukey hm..... why this ]
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It doesn't matter. What does matter is that Percival looks even better than he'd imagined in any of these idle and guiltridden daydreams of the past. He's momentarily gone quiet as the other man strips, eyes taking in the exposed skin that Percival isn't able to cover.
He would have liked to disrobe the other man himself, but he'd moved too quickly and of his own accord, and he supposes this is more efficient, anyway.
Because this was all practical, wasn't it? Not something to make a habit of.
Unceremoniously, he begins unclothing himself as well, pulling his simple t-shirt over his head and stepping out of his trousers. It's about as sexy as one would expect someone getting ready for work, rather than what was really going to happen. He leaves his undergarments on.
There's some embarrassment on his end, too, his cheeks tinged with color, and maybe that would help Percival cope better with his own apprehension. He steps closer to him, fingers trailing over the top of his robe being held in place. ]
Are you having second thoughts?
[ He looks Percival directly in the eye. He's always been able to trust Percival to say what's on his mind, and now is no exception. The last barrier needs to come off, but not if Percival still has doubt. ]
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His heart beats quicker in his chest when Siegfried draws near, and the warmth he can feel radiating off the other man is well-noted. Percival's face may be averted, but his gaze flickers to Siegfried one too many times, taking in the sight of the other man's body - something his imagination has traveled in those few guilt-ridden occasions he's pondered over what the other man might look like beneath his many layers. A proud, sculpted form, with skin sunkissed and ridden with the scars of his many pursuits. It's better than he had envisioned.
When his eyes travel to Siegfried's face, he takes notice of that blush settling by his cheeks, and that's definitely a new development. It spurs Percival on now, that feeling that he wasn't alone in his shyness. ]
Not at all. [ He's found some confidence now, and the hand shielding his modesty lowers, Percival himself taking a step closer into Siegfried's space. ] I've never seen your face take that shade.
[ It's quite cute. He feels like he has permission, so he reaches out to touch, brushing Siegfried's hair to the side. ] Surely you must be used to this by now, given the way this place is ...
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Percival acknowledging his blush only deepens the color, the tender gesture making his heart ache.
They are so different, but he has so much reverence for Percival. Likely more than Percival himself knows. ]
It's embarrassing when you point it out like that...
[ The next sentence makes his eyes flutter closed and his lips purse. Next follows a small smile. ]
What do you take me for, Percival? [ a SLUT?? anyway Percival isn't wrong, this simply isn't a topic he wants to dwell on. He'd rather focus on Percival, not think about previous encounters. Not when the current one holds so much weight and makes him emotionally unsettled.
He chooses to end the topic there, if Percival will allow him, by stepping forward and initiating a kiss, their first kiss, a gesture that sends wildfire through his veins even if it's soft and tentative. His hands frame the other's face. ]
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He doesn't have a chance to clarify himself, and when Siegfried draws closer he doesn't feel like he particularly wants to. The topic is left to disappear in the wind, overshadowed by the very real experience of sharing a first kiss with an old, cherished friend he's revered since his teens.
His heart races in his chest, those butterflies making their home in his stomach, and it takes a second for his mind to catch up before he allows his deeper inhibitions to take the reigns just this once. Percival tilts his head into the kiss, hands trembling but wanting as they reach out to splay over Siegfried's chest, shifting up his shoulders and wrapping around his neck. ]
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Kissing Percival, however— that's an entirely new experience. His lips are softer than he could have imagined, the kiss tender and curious and completely at odds with Percival's usual temperament. But he knows Percival, underneath it all, is sweet. It's what's made Siegfried so drawn to him over the years, his generosity and genuine love for his fellow man traits that Siegfried admired and drew inspiration from. He feels privileged to access this soft side of him, even if at the moment it's physically.
He wraps his arms around the other's waist, letting his fingertips trickle down his spine.
Oh, right. He'd momentarily forgotten about that tail.
Curious, his fingers curl around the base of it, giving it a few experimental tugs and stroking along the fur. He pulls away from their kiss briefly because at this point it's apparently better to ask for forgiveness rather than permission, letting their noses touch. ]
... Sorry. [ this is a very serious undertaking and he doesn't take it lightly, but he just can't help it. It's so cute. ]
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[ It's so rare that he's actually held, his strict and stuffy demeanor often putting some distance between himself and others (when he doesn't deliberately push them away himself). His body's unused to the touch, especially right now while vulnerable and exposed, and the fingers encircling his slim waist have all his muscles tensing. It's not bad. Nice, actually, like he's being claimed.
Though, that bubble of pleasant thought pops with the bizarre sensation of having his tail stroked and tugged, the receptors in that appendage that hadn't existed there a week before firing up and feeling so strange. Much like a cat, that tail tenses up, hairs standing. ]
I don't think you are very sorry. [ Percy frowns, face flushed and frazzled and showing discontentment, but thankfully what Siegfried had done isn't enough to make him want to pull away. ] That feeling ... I cannot get used to it still.
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It really is like a feline's tail. He must truly be becoming a deviant, because the way it tenses and flickers within his hand only makes his desire heighten. ]
Does it feel unpleasant?
[ He loosens his hold on it, running his fingers down the fur more gently, a silent apology. He dots light kisses on Percival's cheek. ]
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I suppose ... not. [ It would be untoward to lie. His ears have flattened down on his head at this point, fingers digging lightly into Siegfried's back as the touch compels him to crane his neck much like a cat. ] Is this fun for you?
[ Wow. ]
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[ Siegfried murmurs against neck. Perhaps he should leave this alone, given how unhappy Percival had been about having these extra appendages in the first place. But he's drawn to how such simple touches can make the other man squirm like this, enticed by the tail curling around his wrist. He scratches lightly at the base. ]
Should I stop?
[ But unless Percival speaks up very soon, he's going to direct his other hand to thread into his hair, tracing the curvature of those flattened feline ears. ]
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Don't stop ... [ It's so shameful that he likes this, but he does. Well, there's no reason to keep being ashamed when they're already in the nude and know exactly what they're about to do. ]
I see the purpose of these useless appendages now. [ To encourage sex, probably. It's working. He's definitely hard now, and compelled to lean into the touch, so he does, wrapping his arms around Siegfried and nestling against his body. The desire for warmth and affection is compelling. He's melting into Siegfried's hold, ears flattened down in contentment and tail swaying about. ]
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But the fact that he's naked and pressed against him? There's nothing cute about what he wants to do to him. His breath hitches in his throat as he pulls them closer, and he can feel the edge of Percival's cock press against his thigh.
It's time to stop playing around.
He rests his hands where he'd originally intended to let them wander, gripping Percival's ass and lifting him with a hold on his upper thighs. Like this, trusting that Percival will know to hold onto his neck and shoulders, he carries him to the bed, laying him down on his back. He pulls off his underwear before joining him. ]
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Wait a second! [ It's emasculating to be picked up so easily, even if he's long known about Siegfried's impressive strength. Percival's weight should be of effort to him, the one slighter in build between them both. Soon, he's laid down, underwear flying off to somewhere on the bed, and there's one hell of a man climbing over him.
It's definitely real now. It's happening. His heart's beating so quick, but he quite relishes in the feeling of Siegfried's larger frame hovering over him, entertaining the racy thought that it would be nice to be pinned down. He shelves that quickly because there's a shame that overcomes him soon after.
Tentatively, hands reach out, moving down the span of Siegfried's chest and tugging at his waistband. ] Yours also. Let me see it ...
[ The tail continues to sway with anticipation, brushing up against Siegfried's thigh and curling around it. ]
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He smiles at Percival's eagerness to pull down his underwear, a new rush of excitement coursing through his veins. This isn't a side of Percival he's ever seen, but, shamefully, he finds himself liking it. The tail curling around his thigh only teases him further. ]
I'll let you do the honors, then.
[ His hands go over Percival's, guiding him to pull down on the garment. Once that's off, he reclaims his spot on top of him, waves of chestnut-colored hair forming a curtain around their cheeks as he indulges in what he'd fantasized about just a few minutes prior: taking one of those feline ears between his teeth and nibbling lightly. ]
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Of course, he's never been one to idle. Percival reaches out himself, hands exploring the canvas of rugged flesh and different scars on display before him, fingertips trailing the embossed ridges of the ones along Siegfried's chest that he's able to touch. There are some that pull out a memory of battles long past, those chaotic days crossing swords against the enemy, where he would always look upon this man for guidance and inspiration. There are also some he doesn't recognise, which brings upon a sinking feeling when he's reminded of their lost time -- when he simply believed what he was told about Siegfried and hadn't questioned it as much as he should have.
When his fingers trail around, roaming over the span of Siegfried's muscled back, he's met with a rougher sensation much unlike the rest. It's not normal skin, having an almost snake-like quality. ]
Oh. This ... [ That sinking feeling continues when he realises what he's touching. It's easy to forget what's actually going on with the other man, especially with how rarely he bares his body. ] Has it gotten worse?
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He can feel Percival's hands exploring him, taking their time to map out his body, and being treated with such gentleness and reverence makes Siegfried's chest ache with a different sort of longing. How many times have they already given their bodies to each other, in the form of taking literal deadly blows for the other's sake? He gently parts the other's legs with his palms, settling in between them and groaning at the sensation of his fingers roaming his back.
The patches of skin there, the parts of him that are onyx and cold rather than human... when they meet the warmth of Percival's fingers it becomes immediately obvious those areas are especially responsive to touch. His muscles tense and relax every time his fingers graze over them.
He looks back up, giving the other man what he hopes is a reassuring smile. He also wonders if Percival is turned off by their presence. ]
Hm. Yes, but the spread seems to have slowed down. [ He returns his attention to Percival's adam's apple, nuzzling his nose against it. ] You don't have to touch there if you don't wish to.
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The soft smile that Siegfried gives probably was intended to be reassuring, but it's not enough to cull the worries that make home in Percival's mind when he's confronted with the fact that his old friend is turning into a dragon. Will he lose his mind along with his form? 'Slowed down' doesn't quite mean it's stopped.
Siegfried's quick to give him that out, as if the scales are anything to be disgusted at. Percival retaliates by touching them directly, fingers following along the ridges of each scale. ]
Why wouldn't I want to? You're still the same man, no matter what becomes of you. Do you think our relationship is so shallow I would be deterred by outside appearances?
[ His words are firm, but his touch is soft, exploring the new skin with one hand and threading his flingers through Siegfried's hair with the other. ]
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Even when he'd thought him a murderer, Percival's forgiveness had come swiftly and laced with the typical layer of hidden empathy he always had.
His loyalty was unprecedented. The thought makes Siegfried lean down to kiss his jaw.
He isn't ready for this conversation. Not when his night is looking so lovely and positive and filled with resolving years of hidden desire. ]
Is that so? Will you still bed me when my transformation is complete, then? I think we might need a much bigger bed... I doubt I would even fit in this apartment.
[ He's joking, to deflect, because he can't even fathom the actual reality of that happening. He'd sooner disappear into the wilderness to keep others safe than entertain such an idea.
He shakes his head, sighing as he feels those fingers roam again. ]
Thank you, Percival. It'll be alright.
[ It has to be. He continues his journey southward, because there's nothing more he wants to do than to forget his impending doom within the soft caress of Percival's hips, to lose himself in creamy thighs. ]
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[ To any logical and rational person, bedding a dragon sounds like an aberrant and dangerous thing. It goes without saying that he would not even consider that sort of act with any other wild beast or creature. This is Siegfried, however, and now he's struck with aberrant thoughts of how such an act would play out. It's a daunting thing - the logistics would make it near impossible - but there's a part of him that thinks he'll probably still want to please the other man, no matter what form he takes. He'll also still want to experience that raw power and gentle intimacy behind each and every of Siegfried's touches - having had a taste of it now, it would be difficult to go back.
Aberrant thoughts all around. Percival's face starts to burn red, and he closes his eyes, turning away in shame. ] Enough jest. Neither of us want that to happen to you.
[ They'll find a way to stop the spread before it's too late. That's what he should be focused on, not ... whatever it was that had plagued his mind before.
He can feel the brush of Siegfried's curls against his chest as the man descends, and Percy finally looks upon him, face still pink and lips pursed. He shifts his body into a more inviting position, thighs parting and sandwiching Siegfried's torso. His hands continue to encourage that touch, rubbing slowly down the span of his back. ]
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But what matters is that they're here now, human and performing what is the most human act since the beginning of time. He looks up at Percival as he settles between his legs, making brief eye contact and giving him a small reassuring smile. Even if the other still looks abashed, the reassuring touch at his back encourages him.
Siegfried buries himself in Percival's inner thigh, kissing along the soft skin, making a path inward. Until his lips can reach their destination, he curls his fingers around Percival's shaft, stroking the hardened flesh slowly, teasingly. ]
i just remembered that this is a furry thread
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